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Let's Panic: The Book!

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How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
who Will Ruin Your Body, Destroy Your Life, Liquefy Your Brain,
and Finally Turn You
into a Worthwhile
Human Being.

Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

Some Books
I'm In...

Sleep Is
For The Weak

Chicago Review Press

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Let's Panic

The site that inspired the book!

At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it. → 

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Use your inside voice, BBC World News

This morning I walked Henry to school and as we walked, he narrated a complicated story about something. I could pretend I know what he was talking about, but in reality I wasn't following a word of it. I lost the thread while I was trying to find his hat, and then I just let it go while he kept on talking. There were things or people exploding, that much I remember. Every time he let out a dramatic BLAM I would murmur, "Oh, my!" Beyond that I said, "Uh huh," "Really!", and "Wow." He was still talking as I handed him off to his teachers. I don't think he noticed or cared that no one was listening, the poor dear. I am sure the saga will still be going strong at pickup time.

Anyway, I got home, and I was getting my breakfast ready and trying to figure out what sort of side dishes I could make for my sister's Thanksgiving dinner, when I realized I had just said "Really!" and "Huh!" There was no one there, and the voice I was humoring? Was coming from NPR.

In my defense, they were really going on and on. I mean, okay, Chinese illegals coming over the Mexican border, we get it. Now go play with Legos, NPR, and let Mommy have a little quiet time.

Reader Comments (29)

This reminds me of the Mary Tyler Moore episode where, after she backs out of the room nervously and bumps into things, Lou Grant says to her, "You're the only person I know who apologizes to furniture.
November 21, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterWeeze
That's almost as bad as the time my husband and I dropped off the kids at their Nana's and spent the next 45 minutes listening to Barney and not realizing it- without kids in the car!
November 21, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterBrighton
I was raised by the one person in the world who would tell a five-year-old that they were boring them to pieces. By the time I was seven, my Bummy would just tell me, "I don't care" or "It's not fun to listen to the entire plot of a movie" and so on. My sister used to get out that little Fisher Price chair -- the yellow one that came with the kickin' kitchen set -- and sit with a book in her lap, screaming intermittently, "Shut up, I'm doing my taxes," and "Get out of here and take your ugly sister with you!"

I used to think it was really unfair until I listened to my sister (11, from the "second set" of children) drone on and on and on about Little Miss Sunshine. Now, I hadn't seen the movie & didn't want to be spoiled, so I just held the phone to my ear for a few seconds at a time to see if she was still talking, listening for a pause in the rumble to interject a "Ah," and "Oh, really?" IT WORKED AWESOMELY.

I think I am much nicer than my Bummy, though it doesn't mean I wasn't tempted to tell the sister, "It's not fun to listen to the entire plot of a movie."
November 25, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterAunt Dave
P.S. "& take your ugly sister with you" worked wonderfully to send two girl racing out of the room, determined to be the first through the door.
November 25, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterAunt Dave

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