This one's for you, YOUMAKEMESICK.

I try not to engage the trolls, but the latest rash of negativity is getting me down. Historically, when I am bummed out by my blog, I avoid it for a few days, but as you may know, that is no longer an option for me. I am committed, people.

Apparently I have angered some people with my "donate" button. (And I agree with the comments that "donate" is a misleading term, and implies that I need a kidney. I mean, I would love an extra kidney, just as a backup, but need is overstating the matter. I would prefer calling it "tips" or some such, but the button belongs to PayPal. Maybe I could design my own? This is outside my sphere of knowledge. I am but a humble wordsmith.) (Wow, could that have been a longer aside? I don't think so.) I know that they're angry because they’ve used words like "bitch" and "whore," and people don't generally call you these things when they're pleased with you.

At first I was amused by the sad people who have nothing better to do than hurl invective at the Internet. But the comments accumulated, and now I'm cranky. Given that donations (tips, contributions, whatever) are strictly optional, that I am demanding exactly nothing but rather providing an opportunity for those who want to contribute to do so, I think the anger directed at the idea of donating is an excuse. An excuse to spit at "stupid mommybloggers" who dare to think that their "useless blogs" (actual quotes, dear readers!) are worth anything. If you have that much contempt for me and my ilk, why are you here? Move along, sir or madam; there's plenty of porn or celebrity gossip out there you could enjoy instead. You know: real content that deserves money.

It can't just be about the idea of donating. To paraphrase my friend Kyran, I doubt that you routinely kick over open guitar cases on the sidewalk, or fling piano-top brandy snifters against the wall.

Although maybe you do. The next time I see someone on the street, punching his hand through a top hat while a mime silently weeps, I'll say hi.

Comments

[Tarin]

I paid bills yesterday. One is the NY Times, just the Sunday paper. It's $forty-something a month. I don't read it ever week, and when I do I don't really get all that much out of it.

Contrast that with the fact that I visit here every day. I don't know what I will find, but I do know that I will enjoy it.

Alice, I say YAY to YOUMAKEMESICK. Without YOUMAKEMESICK, I honestly don't think I would have given this all that much consideration. Without YOUMAKEMESICK I would not have stopped to think about how worth it you are to me.

I'm going to donate. I have to figure out how, since I don't have an account. But I will. So there, YOUMAKEMESICK. I hope you make her rich.

[Shellie]

I think the button is a good idea. We subscribe to newspapers and magazines with worse writing. Why not, like the musician in the subway have a donation box of sorts? Your writing is good. No one is being forced to pay you. I was not mislead. Keep it up!

[Tara]

You can thank the trolls for my donation today.

It's a small thanks for all the amusement you have provided. If it weren't for the trolls I wouldn't have even noticed the donate button. Also, I tend to do whatever rude people tell me not to do.

[Tammy]

Whywhywhywhywhy are people always willing to prove what assholes they can be? I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, Alice. Knowing that the person dishing out the assholery is an asshole is something of a comfort, but it still doesn't take 100% of the icky post-dealing-with-an-asshole feeling away.

Now I've used up my monthly quota for saying "asshole." And I haven't finished my Christmas shopping yet. Dang.

[Laura]

Hi Alice. I read you a lot. I'm so excited you're going to continue posting everyday. If/when I can, I will donate. I can't really do it right now. But I wish I could. And the button is not offensive. Ignore the trolls. I don't get people who leave negative comments on blogs. If you don't like the blog then DON'T READ THE BLOG. It's that simple yet so many don't get it. Keep up the funny posting.

[Hall]

Hiya, count me another lurker who just donated cuz trolls suck!

[scubagirl6]

Clearly, YOUMAKEMESICK missed the post about Klaus Kinski in high school. S/He'd be hitting donate, too, after that. Rock on, Alice!

[Meg]

It's SUPER easy to change that PayPal button, Alice. If you want any help, email me and I'd be happy to make a new button for you and send you instructions on how to swap it out in PayPal! It would literally take us both about 3 minutes each to do, I promise!

I think "Donation" is fine, personally -- readers who enjoy your site are sending you donations to help you keep it running (not just in terms of the software/hardware involved, but also in terms of wanting to pay for your time so that you can continue to keep using that time to write for the blog!). In that way, I don't see it as being much different from people who donate to theaters, museums, or other cultural things that they've enjoyed and would like to help maintain.

But if you think that word is part of the problem, it's incredibly simple to fix and I'd be happy to help!

[Jenn]

I would totally give you a kidney, or anything else I had, lady. People are insane. They've figured out that you're buying Dubai islands in your spare time. Leave that button up, lady. Appreciate = donate in non-troll circles. That's a lovely thing.

[Poppy]

Hey, I was donating way back when, in the old days, when we few, we proud finslippy readers were worried about the state of Alice's jeans. Or shoes.

(OK, it's been a while, and I can't remember when or why.)

I won't donate now, because I'm too cool to do what everyone else does.

But! I'll donate at some yet-to-be determined point in the future. Because that's the kind of independent-minded PayPal button pusher I am.

See, trolls? I can fling my money about with abandon. And you can't stop me.

[sass]

Dear Alice,I too am on a thin budget, but will keep the button in mind when times are less lean. I do, however, want to chime in with mad love for your blog. I am also a mom with my own challenges, and reading your blog makes me feel not so alone in them. It is refreshing to read your wit and sarcasm and abounding love for your family. Thank you for what you do...

[Shannon]

I noticed that there were 137 comments and it is nearly a month later. I came across your blog briefly some time ago then switched computers and lost it. Now I've found it again (and marked it to favorites because I'm tech savy like that). I just read from your latest post to here and laughed all the way down (except for this one, of course). I hope you were able to put those fools' comments aside and forget them. That was very sad and totally rotten of them, frankly.