What happens.
March 9, 2007This is what happens: I start out the week thinking, I'm going to post every day! On my happy happy blog! And all my nice readers will respond and we'll have a great dialogue going and then we'll all get together for s'mores!
You should know that my mind is crammed with exclamation points as well as flights of fancy that end in all of us making s'mores.
Did you all grow up making s'mores with your family? I do not recall making s'mores, ever. Which is odd because my mother has this strange, obsessive love of marshmallows. This is the kind of thing I would bug her about when I was right out of college and had just started therapy. "WHY DIDN'T WE EVER MAKE S'MORES," I would demand in another late-night post-emotional-revelation phone call. "I JUST THINK I WOULD BE HAPPIER IF WE HAD BEEN A S'MORES-MAKING KIND OF FAMILY."
Yes, so. I have all these high hopes for my blog, but then it's one of those weeks—those dreaded weeks when exactly nothing happens. Plus, could it be a more nondescript time of the year? I mean, maybe it's your birthday or it's the day you won that triathlon or the week you fell in love or found your pet possum or I don't know what. For me, anyway, this is pretty much the kind of week where all I can do is hunker down and wait. Especially when it snows--that's just insulting. We're gearing up for spring, and you're going to give us snow? Fuck you. Fuck you, weather. Yeah, you heard me. Fortunately (FOR THE WEATHER), the snow went away, and now we're left with this bitter cold—and oh, crap, I'm talking about the weather. Do you see? Do you see what I have spared you?
So then when my non-posting becomes, like, a thing , a thing in my twisted mind, my imagined readers grow restless, then hostile, and I think, I can't write just any old crap, I have to make it up to them, I have to hit it out of the ballpark, and then I picture my readers growling (you growl, in my mind) and shaking your s'mores sticks at me (are there sticks, when you make them? See, I don't even know) and demanding quality entertainment. This, of course, leads to total paralysis. Which then leads to this, my mortified re-entrance, my shuffle out onto the stage as you're all filing out, throwing your programs to the ground in disgust. Wait, don't leave! I've got a little number all worked out!
But enough about me. How's your week been? I've missed you.
Reader Comments (100)
As to the week, some friends and I are taking a herd of 5 year olds to the circus tomorrow. Do they make intravenous Advil?
My mother never made these at home. However, she was my Girl Scout leader so these were mom-related moments. However, don't ask about the complexities of your mom being the Girl Scout leader.
As for the weather - I am so with you. I do hibernate in the winter. But I don't get skinny. I get fatter. That's because instead of leaving my house I just eat more and stay home. I look at 10 degree weather in mid-March as a personal affront.
And on top of that I had a dentist appointment today and found out I have to have a crown. Thank God it's Friday at least.
S'mores: While we were not the outdoors type of family, my parents made sure that we kids went off with other people (girl scouts, church camps, etc) that went outdoors and made s'mores. That prolly says a lot about my family, doesn't it?
Thanks a lot weather. I hate you too.
In any case I love your updates even when they are just to tell us you don't really have anything to say. You rock!
Moments before the above-linked photo was taken, my mother asked me, "how are you going to make s'mores over an open fire?" Thank goodness the woman was sensible enough to send me to Girl Scouts. How did you get turned on to 'em?
I would also SOOOOO like to hibernate until April. It certainly IS fricking cold in Boston...
S'MORES RECIPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ingredients:2 sheets of plain graham cracker1/2 a regular Hershey chocolate bar2 large marshmallows
Directions:Break each sheet of graham cracker in half, yielding 4 squares. Place on a microwaveable plate. Break chocolate in half, and place each piece on one of the graham squares. Place each marshmallow on top of the chocolate. Microwave on high for about 20-30 seconds, until the marshmallow fully expands. Moving quickly, smoosh each marshmallow with one of the untopped graham squares to make a sandwich.
Enjoy over a plate so you can lick up all the chocolate that drips out. Mmmm.
My week? I'm sick to death of teaching and will be so glad when this quarter is over.
I'm sorry, that was a very long parenthetical that went completely off my point. My point: Get thee to some s'mores immediately. S'mores are the nectar of the sugar gods!
:)
How's that for interesting dialogue? I know, I am TOTALLY BLOWING YOUR MIND.
How about we plan ahead for next year and declare the second week of March as "Close Up Your Blog and Sit Around Eating S'mores" week? Now we have a year to figure out the perfect s'mores recipe, along with concocting some signature martini drink that will accompany it nicely. And then next year? We'll have a whole week to sit around and drink and eat s'mores and feel like we are accomplishing something!
But before I wised up to bloglines, I'd click over here every day, and get a little edgy once it had been a week or so. It was not a healthy state of affairs. So thanks to bloglines, you don't have to feel guilty and I don't have to feel pathetic. Huzzah.