We'll be rich! RICH!
Scott and I just got back from our tour of the local public elementary school, which Henry will be attending next year. You've probably heard me bitch about this before, but Henry just missed the cut-off date for kindergarten, which in New Jersey is October 1st. Henry's birthday is the 7th of October. Could they let us in anyway? They could not. Damn their rules!
I agree with the millions upon trillions of people who love telling us how this was for the best, but what they fail to take into consideration is that preschool is not free; nay, each month many many dollars are torn from our hands as we weep and fall onto the ground, rending our garments.
But next year! Oh, next year, my friends, it's public-school time for our boy. Thus, the tour. We asked questions and pretended to care about the answers, but really, as long as the school isn't in flames we'll send him there. Ha ha! Ideally it should be more than just not on fire. We have standards! Fortunately for everyone the school was both not on fire and also pretty great. The principal walked us around for over an hour, answering our questions, which went like this:
"So it's free, you say?"
"Really? Free?"
"How much is tuition? Come on, seriously."
"Don't bring me down with your 'local taxes' talk. What will we do with all that extra money?"
"Can you provide us with recipes for meals that aren't beans? Now that we're all rich?"
"I mean, not that I don't like beans. But enough already, am I right?"
"Can you tell us more about the free part?"
Beyond its freeness, there are many other attributes to the school. I think Henry will enjoy himself there. And we will enjoy him being there, as we wallow in our newfound riches.
There's a new Wonderland post up today. And now: lunch! So long, suckers!










February 29, 2008
Reader Comments (45)
Our public school is a zingy melange of warmth, nurturance, and intellectual challenge, all tied up in a big bow of stressing social skills and emotional intelligence.
Alas, they do not have ponies, which is probably what it would take to get my second child enthusiastic about going there. But then it wouldn't be free. Which it is. Have you noticed that? Is your school free, too? In a tuition-less kind of way?
The worst part of that whole thing for ME was being a 17 year old college freshman and needing my parent's SIGNATURE to get the after-hours building key for my dorm. Of course my parents wanted assurance that I would be in my room before the doors were locked at 11, and that the key was just in case there was some kind of act of God that would keep me out past dark.
You can see why I was anxious to get away to college! Enjoy your new riches!
JulesHouse of Jules
I'll sell my left kidney (if necessary) to keep my offspring in private school. $15K a year and completely worth it!!
Congrats on what will soon be a great windfall for you. I'll try not to be bitter.
I will miss it when Morgan graduates in June I've been associated with the school since 1993 (Yikes!)
Now it is your turn to volunteer to be the home and school president (BWHAHAHAHAHA!!!!)
We have been paying for preschool for 4 years and have 2 to go (3 kids, in case that wasn't clear). Lots of fun.
Guess I should start saving now for the second one.