A rant, because this is all I can do.
January 3, 2013Right before Christmas, I got to have a needle core biopsy on my right breast. A few days before that, I found an impressive lump, which I quickly had checked out by my GP, who hurried me along to get a mammogram and an ultrasound. The radiologist informed me that I had a few cysts (six!) in my right breast as well as a tumor (a large one!) which he preceded with the words "definitely benign," so as to keep me from falling off the table. It worked! "Definitely benign" has a lovely, comforting ring to it. Still, though, he said we'd want to do the biopsy right away, which they did. And after it was all done, and I was lying there icing my poor, drilled boob, the warm, comforting, grandfatherly doctor who performed the biopsy assured me--PROMISED me--that the results would be in two days later, "at the latest."
HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAaaaaa. Hurk.
I'm not going to bury the lede, here: I still don't have the results. And although I have been assured that I am most definitely going to be all fine, I would like to know, please, thank you and goodbye. I would like to not think about this any longer. And yet I am forced to think about this, a lot longer. I am feeling a little crazy. I am ready to march down to the NYU labs and start knocking heads together. Only then they wouldn't be able to give me the results, what with all the brain injuries.
And you know, if they had TOLD me it would take a while, I would have resigned myself. If they hadn't said to me, "This is the last thing you want to worry about over the holidays," I would have expected to worry about it over the holidays. Worrying's what I do, after all, so I'd add this to the list. But since they were all concern and rush-rush with me from the start, I assumed we would continue on that course. It's fun to assume things.
Instead, when I called the radiologist's office two days later, I received an incredulous "What? Of course the results aren't in yet." Then I was told to call back in a few hours. Once again, I was met with incredulity. Two days! Do I think I'm the Queen? The Queen of New York? "Call back Monday, that's when they'll be in," I was told. I couldn't believe I would now have to wait an entire weekend. Ha, ha! I was so cute, back then.
On Monday, the same woman who assured me the results would be in on Monday was amazed I would think they'd be in on Monday. "It's Christmas Eve! The lab's not even open." Call back Wednesday, she said. Because duh.
I bet you can guess what she said on Wednesday. And on that day, my friends, on that day I said to myself, "I will not be calling this office ever again. I now hate this person, and I don't want to hate someone, so I will turn my attention solely to my GP." Oh, because also, after the fifth phone call, the woman at the radiologist's finally told me that no one but my GP could give me the results anyway, so really there was no reason to call her. This is the same woman who was standing right there as Dr. Grandpa lovingly squeezed my shoulder and assured me I'd wait but 48 hours, at the most. She didn't roll her eyes even a little when he said that, and I LOOKED.
My GP continues to take my calls and emails, but she's not getting answers either, and today I couldn't stand it anymore so I called the radiologist's, again. My hate had receded, and I thought, maybe in 2013 the lady who answers the phone will be nicer. Maybe she'll tell me whom to harass at the lab. Who knows? Stranger things have happened.
"Hi, it's Alice again. Alice Bradley," I said, chuckling (why chuckling?). "Still waiting on those biopsy results, as you know." Chuckle, chuckle. Oh, me.
"They're not in yet," she said.
"Wow," I said. "This is getting nuts." Mildly, though. She could hold my results hostage, after all, so I'm trying to stay on her good side. I mean, if she has one.
And, then, my friends, she hung up. On me? Or just because she was done? I'll never know.
And, look, I sympathize. A little. She's not in control of when the lab results come in. But she should sympathize too, no? A little.
Reader Comments (61)
You need to complain to her supervisor. Seriously. Please do it. People with no or very little compassion and patience have no business being in the medical profession at any level. I am hoping for all the best for you.
Those results were in after, at the latest, 5 days. They are THERE and they are waiting to be seen by you GP. There's no reason for you to wait any longer for fucks sake. Call your GP, tell him what stupid assholes are over at the radiologists office and tell him your waited long enough , you want your damn results.
waiting for results BLOWS. Will be thinking of you.
So, I'm a waitress, and people are often really mean to me. And I'm only bringing them their food. If this radiology-office-lady is rude to you, she should be YELLED AT, because she's dealing with potentially life changing information and she needs to be SENSITIVE for that.
(((Alice)))
Oh my gosh, YES! She should care! Having to wait this long is abso-freaking-lutely ridiculous. I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Waiting for test results is hideously horrible.
Is there a way you could get Dr. Grandpa on the phone so you could inquire with him? He'd probably be ticked to find out that it's taking this long. Sometimes a nudge from the right person can get the lab to get their shit together.
It is impossible to get the radiologist (aka Doc Grampa) on the phone. I've stopped trying. My GP is now in direct contact with the lab, and they promised me results today, and then closed without giving us results, of course. OF COURSE.
Argh! So frustrating for you! You must just want to spit. (I've been in the South for too long. Spitting is kind of rude. Maybe you just want to hit something with a stickball stick or the like - that would be more Brooklyn-ish.) Here's hoping that they'll stop screwing with your mind and give you some answers tomorrow. Hear that lab people? TOMORROW!
I'm a longtime, quiet reader and I'm driven out to post on this one! I'm married to a pathologist (MD that diagnoses biopsies and tissue). The only possible explanation is that there was something "off" about the sample and it was sent out for further testing. The reason I say this is that in the 3 labs he's worked in over 12 years, there is always a policy of signing out breast biopsies first thing in the morning. My husband actually specializes in breast pathology, and every once in a while he'll get a sample that he KNOWS is benign, but it just didn't stain right, so he sends it to someone with more letters after his name to get the definitive call. Alternately, you're dealing with a bunch of jerk doctors who are arguing with each other over vacation and call schedules and nobody looked at the slide yet, but that's unlikely.
Next step for you might be to call your GP's office, find out which lab it was sent to, call the lab, and ask what the heck is going on. Anything removed from your body is your property and it is your right to follow up directly instead of through primary care channels. The pathology lab will be able to tell you what the hold up is on the diagnosis. It's not unusual for my husband to get calls from patients asking for plain word definitions of his reports, but, then again, we live in a very small town.
Here's to unexciting pathology reports! :)
Start making Xerox copies of your right boob and send them with accompanying Sharpie speech bubbles asking if the results are in. To everyone involved.
So sorry you're going through this. I'd call them all every day.
Hugs.
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