Big changes

We’re moving in twelve days. Ish. We’re moving in twelve-ish days. Also? The final, final, finally-final edit of our book is due in fourteen days. (No “ish,” there. Fourteen days. Two weeks from today.) Those are two very big things that I am doing in two weeks. So.

This final book edit includes all the art that will be in the book, which includes not only the excellent illustrations by our devastatingly talented illustrator (as well as additional images by a multi-talented blogger you may be familiar with, and if you’re not, you should be) but also all the public-domain clip art and photos we’re relying on because 1) illustrations are expensive (if worth it!) and 2) did you know that the authors have to pay the illustrator out of their advance? Or their trust funds? Whichever? The things you learn!

So I'm a little busy. It’s a good thing I have these beta blockers to abuse, I’ll tell you what. Plus fistfuls of Xanax. I am so goddamn mellow.

Let’s talk about our apartment, shall we? We got an apartment. I’m really excited. It’s the only apartment on the third and top-most floor, which means there shall be no one above us to stomp around and/or murder each other. (Of course some pigeons might engage in a final showdown up there. As they do.) No one will even be walking past our door. And if anyone approaches our floor, we have permission to kill them. (I think. I have to check the lease.) Also, once it is built and barring any acts of God etc. we will have a roof deck. Roof. Deck. All to ourselves. Party at our place!

The place is sunny and high-ceilinged and has many other fine attributes, such as a washer/dryer (every apartment dweller in New York just got woozy when they read that), and Henry loves his new room. It's going to be great. In the meantime, though, we have to move, which is unfortunate. Who wants to help us pack? We’ll supply the boxes and packing tape. Where are you going?

The good news is that we’ve seriously streamlined since last year’s move, when we owned a quirky and vast collection of teapots and numerous vintage suitcases filled with tortured diaries and, oh, an an entire basement crammed floor to ceiling with baby items. I’ve discovered that I enjoy nothing more than getting rid of stuff. I am the anti-hoarder. There should be a reality show about people like me. “Squanderers.” “Throwers-away.” You can watch me stacking gravy boats on the curb with a sign that says “FREE! GET IT OUT OF HERE! FREE!” while Scott pleads with me to keep at least one, for God’s sake, surely at some point we will use gravy on something. Get on that, television executives.

Comments

[melissa]

I too am an anti-hoarder. I discovered how awesome it is to craigslist some old baby things (high chair, stroller, etc) and now I'd like to sell everything we own on craigslist. Because I can. The hoarding shows blow my mind. I'm always speechless after watching one of those. How can they..but why do they..but how can anyone...speechless. congrats on the move and the book!

[erika edith]

Wahoo - congratulations. Stressful as it may be to move, it will be worth it when you are settled in your new digs. And the roof top oasis sounds amazing, so much better than murders - even better than a washing machine, if I may say so.

[Kizz]

I did get woozy! Congratulations!

[Katherine]

So happy for you - Here's to an easy move, an elevator to the third floor and drinks on the rooftop!

[tulip]

I'm so happy for you all! That apartment sounds amazing. I think I'm the only person in the world who owns a whole house and daydreams about NYC apartments. Of course my house is teeny but still. :)Yay for roof decks and no murders. I forsee a beautiful relationship with your new home.

[Megsie]

Yay for your new apartment! Roof top??? Yes!

Yay for your new book!

And AAAaaaahhhhhh! for the next two weeks. They will go fast and then...then....yay for your new life!

[SuzRocks]

Congrats on the new place and the rooftop!

As to the moving bit- may I suggest faking an injury a day or two before the big move? Such as two broken arms? That way you're not responsible to carry a thing.

[Suzy]

I call shotgun on "Thrower-Aways" as instead of moving, every 2 years I look around my apartment and say "Who BUYS all this shit?"

Then I donate to Goodwill which unfortunately has some pretty sweet deals whenever I'm there and...well, you know.

[Jodi Belshe]

I'm an avid anti-hoarder too, so much so that when I throw something out- which I do often- I find a need for that item within a month. Oh well, it's a great adventure in flexibility to find a shoe to use instead of a gravy boat!

[Kelly]

I would totally watch Squanderers.

[Amy --- Just A Titch]

A friend once told me that I am the most wasteful mover he's ever seen...if I'm even slightly tired of an item, don't feel like moving it or am too tired, anything will go to the trash. I take it as a compliment, and yes, I'd definitely watch Squanderers.

Best wishes to you & your family during the next two weeks! So many good things...you so deserve them.

[Sarahtk]

The jealousy is oozing out of my eye sockets on the apartment front. I can barely see straight to say Congratulations! And Yay! So happy that you are finding a new start in a great place! Are you still in PS? I so totally will NOT help you move. Have fun with that!

Sarah Neerguard

[Amigurumigirl]

Your new place sounds heavenly!! Congratulations! We just finished moving, too, and I tell you (not like you don't know!) it was no fun. But when all was said and done? ahhhhhhh so velly nice. I also like to throw old clutter away... so when that show gets on air be sure to remember me... (^_^)v

[Barb]

I love getting rid of stuff, too. One of the best antidepressants around.

I would help you move in a heartbeat...if I didn't live in the Midwest.

[Jenny]

I'm a total Squanderer, especially when moving. Once I sold my parents' lawnmower in a moving sale...but they weren't the ones moving and they needed it. But it's just so much fun to get rid of stuff!

However, I would be so sad if you never made gravy again. Keep the boat! And congrats on the book and apartment!

[Marinka]

Great news. Although I'm really disappointed that this post isn't about menopause.

[twojams]

Hey, I will be in NY in twelve-ish days for a visit. I always look for fun, non-touristy things to do, like help locals move. Perhaps if you invited me to a party on your roof deck?

Really, congratulations. Very happy for you!

[Angela]

The new place sounds great!!Good luck the next 2 weeks, and if it's any consolation...my husband and I are getting a divorce (not my idea) and once our house sells we not only get to move, but split up all of our stuff. Ugh.But anyway...yay for you and your new digs!!

[Betsy]

Congratulations on the new place! It sounds DIVINE. It is the washer/dryer that makes that caps-locked.

I can't believe your book is almost done! I can't wait to see it. How did I not know the fabulous Antonia Cornwell was contributing illustrations?? Maybe I did know, but forgot. If I forgot, I'm glad I did, though, because it was such a pleasure to find out again!

[mp]

The new AND old place have elevators right? I'll totally help move if that's the case. I've always wanted to spend a few days in NYC with some locals.

[edj]

Congrats! This is going to be a seriously crazy couple of weeks, but afterwards? All worth it! And rooftop is just TOO COOL.Oh and after moving way too often in the past 10 years, I am also a squanderer. I wouldn't watch a show about people moving though. That's my life. I might as well stare in the mirror. Same entertainment factor.

[Moriah]

The BEST part of living in Brooklyn is leaving FREE stuff out on the stoop and watching how fast it was taken. We would put the most boring things out there (e.g. old law school text books) and think, no one is going to want those, but lo and behold -- always gone in 30 minutes or less. We miss that now that we live in the suburbs and have to pay to have someone take our junk.

[madge]

The show is called Purgers and I am the star.

You can be my co-star.

[norm]

Well I'm envious! About the anti-hoarding, and the roof deck. Congratulations! That said, it's maybe time for you to have a talk with your son about Batman (if you haven't already, of course). I think I only survived the sixties because my house (and thus my takeoff location) was single story.

[lisamarie]

Congratulations on the move, the book, and etc. from a fellow squanderer. (My boyfriend tells me that I have No Sentimentality - this epithet began after I got rid of something that Needed Getting Rid Of, like 5 year old cheap-ass broke-down IKEA pillows. Of his.)