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Let's Panic: The Book!

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How to Endure and Possibly Triumph Over the Adorable Tyrant
who Will Ruin Your Body, Destroy Your Life, Liquefy Your Brain,
and Finally Turn You
into a Worthwhile
Human Being.

Written by Alice Bradley and Eden Kennedy

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Let's Panic

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At LET'S PANIC ABOUT BABIES, Eden Kennedy and I share our hard-won wisdom and tell you exactly what to think and feel and do, whether you're about to have a baby or already did and don't know what to do with it.

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« Craving for a tan. | Main | I know it’s a day early… »
Tuesday
Feb212006

I'm back! But now I'm leaving.

I know! I’m all, “I love you, baby,” and then I go and disappear. For a week! No, eight days!

It’s not that I don’t love you, it’s just—it’s me.

My mind is not working right these days. I seem to be afflicted with the particular brand of insanity that occurs when you spend your weekends trudging through crappy house after crappy house and then finding the one house you like and then bidding on it and then not getting it and also you’re preparing to leave the country for six days. Wait, where are you going? Denmark? Finland? Close enough.

I’m trying to juggle way more things than a person can reasonably be expected to juggle, and I’m not a good juggler. Really. I have serious coordination issues. Meanwhile I have this little boy here with me whose idea of hilarity is to sing, over and over, “Dinah won’t you blow/Dinah won’t you blow/Dinah won’t you blow your BUTT BUTT BUTT.”

Which actually is pretty funny.

Henry has really had it up to here with me. So what else can you do when you have a crazy mother but insist that you go RIGHT NOW to see the crazy dancers?

And after you’re done admiring the craziness of the crazy dancers, you go to the Egyptian Wing, where you tell your mother all about how the mummies are wrapped-up people who have been wrapped up by other mummies. Or mommies? Unclear.

And then you make a ruckus in the “echo room,” which is actually a room full of Rodins, most of which don’t appear to be enjoying the ruckus one bit.

My next post will be from Amsterdam. Six days without Henry and Scott and Charlie the Dog.

Can I handle it? Will I never want to return? We shall see.

Reader Comments (47)

have a great time!!!

we'll be here hopping on one foot, waiting for you to come back...

xoxoxo

:-)
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterNeb
Have fun and bring an umbrella! It's all rainy there this time of year. Everything else about tends to, you know, make up for the crappy weather, though.

Tschous!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterpaige
I love that photo with the Rodin. Poor thing looks like it's so embarrassed it's trying to hide.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterSaartje
Have fun! Sounds like you totally deserve this vacation.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterppwgal
Bring back chocolate. Lots and lots of chocolate. And have a great time. You sure do deserve it.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered Commentermargalit
The question is, can "they" handle it?
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterDD
I wish, I wish, I wish I was you. No kids, no husband. Enjoy! How often does THAT opportunity come along!?
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterKerri
You'll have a brilliant time... like an out of body experience with a Red Light District.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterMeg
oh my. child cuteness in a museum and puppy cuteness of the eyes. i can't handle it all.

sounds like this trip is exactly what you need. hopefully you and melissa will tear it up, and take lots of pics. ;)
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterSarcomical
Hope you get the happiness that you are supposed to get from the persepective that you are supposed to get from the distance.

Hmmmm... seems a little attenuated. If all else fails, get the happiness from the various famously Amsterdam-y vices that you just can't get at home (legally)!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterVaguely Urban
Have fun and bring us back lots of stories and pictures!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered Commenterjody
Delicious cheese and gorgeous canals and serene Dutch babies on the back of bikes...it's pretty hard not to love Amsterdam, but it's always nice to come back.

Have a great trip!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterKristin
Hey! Dooce was just there on some internet thingy. But she's back already so I guess it's something different. It rained for her too but she said she loved it. Have fun.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterJuliaR
Yeah, I've heard the "It's not you; it's me," speech before. *sniff*

And "Dinah won't you blow your BUTT *is* funny. I think I shall teach it to Bella RIGHT NOW.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterBelinda
relax and let loose; have a wonderful time. we'll all be here waiting for you when you get back. xoxo.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered Commentersweetney
Have fun! And I can't believe you're speaking at BlogHer and I'm not going to be there! The world HATES me!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered Commentermom on a wire
How can you leave that face for that many days??

Oh, and the boy. How can you be without the boy for that long?
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterLoLo
Have fun in Amsterdam. I'm so thrilled for you. Please send lots of detail so the rest of us can live vicariously. Good luck with the house stuff. We moved last year when our third baby was just 5 weeks old... I've been in therapy since. I hope you find the perfect house and get a contract soon.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterChristyD
Bon Voyage, Dahling. Surely some time away from the house hunting madness will be good for what ails you.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterJenny
Meanwhile I have this little boy here with me whose idea of hilarity is to sing, over and over, “Dinah won’t you blow/Dinah won’t you blow/Dinah won’t you blow your BUTT BUTT BUTT.”

I was having a nice cup of tea when I read that. Said cup of tea is now soaking my computer screen. Thanks so much. ;D
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterKaguya Hime
HA! Henry is a comic genius.

My kid and I were watching an episode of Teletubbies today, featuring a remarkable segment in which Po and Laa-Laa discover a "tooter" (an oversized paper party horn with a feather at the end). Laa-Laa blows a "big blow" into the tooter, which unrolls and tickles Tinky-Winky's butt. Tinky-Winky, of course, wiggles and giggles, and then blows a "big, big blow" into the tooter, which then unrolls and tickles Dipsy's butt. My daughter was delighted, and spent the next hour or so going on and on about "Tinky-Winky turn! Tinky-Winky big, BIG blow!"

Good luck with the house search, and have a blast in Amsterdam. Eat the brownies!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterTits McGee
i just sent you an email and now i see you posted and i feel like as ass. actually i feel like a butt.

have fun and be gentle with yourself.

xo
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterjenB
Henry's shirt is rad. Have a great time in Amsterdam - hopefully it will be much more relaxing than acupuncture. If someone promised me no conversations about moving or real estate for six days I'd take a trip to the inside of my closet and sit there humming with joy. You're going to have an awesome trip for that reason alone im sure.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterLetterB
Have a great time. I'm sure it will be hard to be away (at a certain point), but hey, "everybody needs a little time away" as Foreigner would say.

Nevermind.

Have fun!
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterMary
You are, I think, a much better person than I am. When I go out of town without husband and child (we have no dog) I become deeply depressed and I go mad missing them. A yawning chasm of meaningless opens out before me. I wonder why I was ever born and yearn for my own annihilation.

And I never want to return.

It's kind of weird actually.

Here's hoping you get the fun, without the horrible missing them and the desire to return without the extreme depression of separation. Pot, lots of pot. Works wonders.
February 21, 2006 | Unregistered CommenterMinerva X

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