I'm cracking down because you told me to.

Last night: Chicken cutlets, steamed broccoli with lemon, whole-wheat couscous.

Result: couscous tasted and vehemently rejected; other foods refused.

Interesting factoid: Couscous can settle into nooks and crannies of your dining room faster than you can say STOP SPITTING IT ALL OVER THE PLACE. You'll find couscous nubbins everywhere the next day! And the bitter memories will resurface.

Tonight: Chicken-apple sausage, sauteed kale, mashed potatoes, butternut squash soup. (What can I say? I'm in a cooking mood. Also, the soup is most definitely not homemade. I'm not in that much of a cooking mood.)

Chances of him eating anything: the butternut squash soup used to be a contender, which is why I'm including it. Everything else? HA HA HA HA HA.

Pray for me.

UPDATE: Nothing. Nothing! He talked a great deal about the soup and how he was going to try it, but then demurred when I offered the slightest bit of encouragement. Luckily I didn't care so this didn't bother me one bit. (I am now stifling a scream.)

Comments

[Michelle]

He'll come around.

Although the flinging of the couscous all over the place would have gotten him sent away from the table. But I'm a mean mommy.

He'll come around, Alice, stick to your guns. :)

[Michelle]

Wow, repetitive. Maybe I should READ my comments before I post them.

[alice]

Oh, believe me, he was sent away. And he went to bed extreeemely early. If you're mean, I'm sadistic.

[Jessie]

Um, can I eat whatever he refuses? Because it sounds delicious. I used to be an incredible picky eater (only macaroni and cheese and hot dogs from ages 2 to 4), but now I eat everything that's put in front of me. Well, almost everything. The tripe listed in yesterday's post would still get a nose turned up at it from me.

[JB]

But mashed potatoes! Mashed potatoes have to be a contender, don't they?

I mean, don't kids come pre-wired to like mashed potatoes?

[S-Way]

I tried couscous on Lula once, when she was younger (maybe 1.5?). I think she disliked the texture, and it was Rejected. Firmly. And couscous is not only small, particulate-wise, but sticky, and it's just a nightmare to pick up all the tiny bits. She'll be much, much older when I try her on couscous again. Sadly, I currently choose new foods for my child to try partly based on how easy they are to clean up from afterwards.

[jonniker]

I have an uncontrollable urge to come over for dinner. Man.

[Michelle]

If it makes you feel any better, I would totally eat everything you put in front of me based on your recent posts. You're making me want to step up my game in the kitchen!

[brandy]

My little cousin went through a phase of eating only hot dogs or grilled cheese..that was it.

maybe feed him the same thing every meal and you eat something "new" and maybe he'll become curious?

[brandy]

Oh and one more thing, my little sister ate only macaroni and cheese for one whole year and now she will call me to tell me she had a delicious meal of haggus or cows tongue. The girl eats things that I would never even consider to be food!There is hope!

[MG]

Good for you!!!!!!!!! Your meals sound absolutely wonderful! I promise he will NOT starve.

[Julie]

Our struggles are more with sleep than food, but we've had our moments with food, too. These are my two main tips, for what they're worth.

- For nights when everyone's eating together, the same meal (if that ever happens!), celebrate somehow -- lighting candles is what worked for us.

- I serve up the main dinner, and they are welcome to have something else easy to fix instead of that IF (big IF) they try the main dinner first, AND (bigger and) they must wait until I (or my husband) have eaten the main dinner and then and only then will I help them get something else. I can't tell you how many times this has defused the power trip... they get bored and start nibbling, and next thing you know... It helps me filter out which times they're just being picky and which times they truly loathe what's being served. Also, I feel far less martyred if I get to actually eat my damn dinner.

Good luck. I found skimming Child of Mine by Ellyn Satter (I think) useful.

[Erika]

What kind of butternut squash soup do you use? I love that, but don't know which brand to buy. Also, have you tried just leaving the food on the table. My little one picks throughout the night, but doesn't always like to sit at the table.

[jody2ms]

What you are doing it right on. And he will come around, and won't starve in the meantime.

Our 2nd child was like that, and so was our third. We made dinner as usual, and if they didn't want to eat it, then fine....they could be excused. But we made sure they were aware before they left the table that the kitchen was closed after dinner, and there would be nothing else offered until breakfast. It did not take long for the issues to die away.

Now they eat everything....including fennel (sauteed in vegetable broth and served with pasta or rice..mmmm)

Good luck!!

[maggie]

I have the same problem you do. Last night, we presented her with a plate of orzo, broccoli and bockwurst (with ketchup). She put the broccoli on my plate, and announced that she wanted ketchup on her orzo and that she wanted no sausage. I told her to scrape the ketchup off the sausage and put it on the orzo. Next thing we knew, she was chowing down on the sausage. And ate all the orzo. BTW, orzo is much like couscous - it tends to get EVERYWHERE. At least the pieces are a little bigger.

Good luck tonight!

[Ty]

Oh good! You can do it!

For the couscous...If you ever must clean it up again, and if you can stand it, just leave it there. When it dries, it is really easy to sweep up.

(Sort of like mud on the carpet. If you let it dry, you can vacuum it out, but if you try to clean it up while it's wet, oh man. What a mess...)

[Jen]

Good start! Just remember to keep all the stuff they can eat during the day to a minimum, and you'll keep the starvation phase of this down to days to a week, rather than weeks!

My neighbor's 4th child ended up,they realized, subsisting solely on the snacks she held out for when the bigger kids came home from school. Juice and crackers,and other carb/sugars basically. They cut out all juice and the snacking, cold turkey, (and actually at the ped's demand, she was a wee sprite). Lo and behold, after a few days, she was suddenly eating. More than one meal. Everyday. And was more pleasant to boot.

She did spend an hour or so of each of those few days clutching at the refrigerator sobbing over and over: Juuuuuuuice, I neeeeeeeeeeed my juuuuuuuuuice.

[Kris H.]

Good for you! Stick to your guns! He WILL NOT starve!

Both of my kids went through an extremely picky stage, but I refuse to be a short order cook or eat the same thing every night, so they are served whatever I make. Sure, they go to bed hungry sometimes (several nights in a row sometimes!)...but they have never starved and they are far more adventurous now.

I do admit that I often give them whatever they want (within reason) for lunch so that they can have one really good meal a day and pack on the calories to make up for missing dinner! :-)

[Jen]

keep all the stuff they can eat during the day

Uhhhh, by "the stuff" I meant junk food and generic nibbling. One tiny, healthy snack late morning and late afternoon, and no grazing.

I wasn't actually saying to make them fast all day long. Unless, that's their choice. ;-D

[Carl]

YES! GOOD WORK! BE STRONG!!!!

Here's the $10k question: Did you enjoy dinner? Wasn't real food tasty?

[anne]

They will sleep through the night.They will use the toilet.They will master the food.They will figure out the whole "homework" thing.

It never feels like it, but I'm fairly sure it happens. The first three, anyway. I'm still working on belief in the fourth. In any case, I think it's a question of learning to be more stubborn than a two-year-old (or four, or, in my case, ten).

[E]

Alice, can I come over for dinner at your house? Amazing stuff you are making (even if Henry is not eating it!)

[nate]

Unfortunately, in answer to a previous poster, children are NOT hard-wired to like mashed potatoes. I think it's a texture thing. French fries: no problem--probably b/c they can be used a vessel for ketchup.

My assvice--I'd do what you're doing except put one thing you know he'll eat (bread or crackers) on the table. Not yogurt. Something that could conceivably be considered part of the meal, but doesn't require extra work on your part. Or yogurt can be the dessert. That way you can have dessert w/o it being sweet. Hmm...that advice is so good that I should follow it!

We have a (seldom-used) rule at our house--if food gets thrown, or spit, etc., *someone* (not naming any names) gets "quiet time" in the living room or her bedroom. Not a time-out--just a "you need to sit down, and you can come back when you're ready to stop throwing food." The reason it's a seldom-used rule is that I learned my lesson about couscous, etc., early, and don't cook it very often...

My daughter loves tomato soup from a box (Imagine, Pacific, etc.) I wonder if she'd like the squash soup too. It'd be a nice change. Hmm, maybe worth a shot.

[Robin in San Jose]

When my older son, who is slightly picky at age 11, was a very very picky toddler my mother used to tell me "hunger is the best sauce". I was a child who SWORE I would never make my kids eat things they didn't want to. I stuck to that vow as a parent, but you know what? My mother was right! They eat WAY more adventureously when they're really hungy. Limit snacks and get the little buggers out to exercize, and when they smell that tasty meal you're cooking for dinner, assure them it tastes JUST as good!

[nate]

You know, I just went back and read yesterday's post, and realized that I told you to do something you were already doing, more or less. So never mind.

However--do you include him when you cook? That seems to be what works for us--she gets very excited (about 50% of the time) about things she helps to make. Sometimes she helps me make dinner but then pronounces it yucky, or spicy, etc., but it works a good portion of the time. Molly Katzen has 2 cookbooks for kids that you might want to take a look at. They're not apple-chicken sausages, but there are some decent things that he might like to help you with.